So I thought that I would step up. I WAS the Brooklyn Rabbit, now I am the Easter Rabbit! A dirty grungy hipster-hopster who PRETENDS to not do the dirty grung thing! Lying is always good on A Dead Man Walked Out of a Cave Day, right, Goyim? Corse, El Tigre, my friend/male/boy, took some convincing.
After hiding the eggs for Tommy's keeds, we had to guard the eggs so that no other West Fourth keed got to them. We didn't have problems with ManBrattans, but we DID with the Squirrel City Alliance. They kept trying to nab our chocolate eggs and real eggs, then, when I tried to chase them away, they'd be all like, "Ah, fekk, dude, we just playin, we just playin." But they WERE NOT JUST PLAYIN'. I had to practically bite them, ridding myself of the vegetarian codes, to get them away.
When the job was done, Tommy said: "Great Jerb, Geeys."
And El Tigre and I headed home to watch the internet move.
We all know who the REAL Jesus/Easter Bunny/ Santa is.
Screw this holiday season, it's too weird and depressing without eggs and magic.
Easter Brooklyn Rabbit